Irony Becomes Her

Getting my REM

I just got back from my next-door neighbors', where I was introduced to yet another form of Relationship Exploitative Marketing (REM). I had heard of Amway, Pampered Chef, and Mary Kay before, but good ideas cannot help but surface over and over.

This time it involved a relatively low-pressure presentation from representatives of ACN, a telecommunications and utilities company. I have no doubt that it is quite true that much money can be made without working. Though it is described with many positive phrases, testimonials, and smiles, that is the heart of the matter. By making an investment of time in manipulating one's closest friends to manipulate their closest friends, one might establish for oneself a steady income for life.

The presentation was more agreeable to me than one I heard a year ago about Mary Kay. This was because utilities are things most people want to buy anyway, and these services are less rather than more expensive than the general fare. That's what they said, at least, and I believe them. The Mary Kay meeting spouted a large amount of fluff about improving women's lives. I would find them much more tolerable if they were more straightforward in their talking points. Something like, "We sell our friends makeup" would get much further with me than "We empower women."

For me, sales are only conscionable where the salesperson truly believes in the quality and value of the product in how it may serve the buyer. Sales pitches should only be successful when they show respect for the intelligence and the free will of the buyer. When they are within these boundaries, I do not object to REM companies. But I have been manipulated before and found it hard not to resent the fact that the salesperson took unfair advantage of my desire to preserve friendship with her. I could not find a tolerable excuse for refusing her offer of a "free facial," and after her pitch, she asked which items I was going to buy rather than if I were interested in buying anything. We might have saved time if she had just said sweetly, "Lynn, dear, would you give me five dollars so we can stay friends?"

Perhaps she was worse than the usual REM practitioner in her style. But I am convinced that if people really have needs, they will notice such and seek solutions themselves. An ethical--but probably not a rich, I suppose--salesperson is available to present solutions, not to exacerbate problems and sell an overpriced balm to soothe them.

But I have no complaints about this evening. Though I have to chuckle when I translate marketing lingo into layman's terminology, these were well-meaning and friendly people. But I know I will never practice REM. Friends, you are safe from me.

posted by Lynn @ 9:31 PM